Dinner and a Movie Part 1

Tonight I had the pleasure of meeting up with two of my favorite people for some food and some cinema. The weather was unusually cold today so it seemed like the ideal night activity. I will subdivide this entry into 2 parts so as to fully capture the experiences I had.

Part One: Dinner.

I only have one word (well two words actually) for the restauranteurs here: "Portion Control". Holy hell, no wonder they have to make extra wide movie theatre seats here. Tonight, with the thought of eating light, I decided to share 3 appetizers as dinner. Thats not so crazy right? 3 apps, 2 people seems like a nice light bite with room for popcorn after.

Sadly, I was mistaken. Each appetizer came out on a humungous plate and had enough on it to feed our table of 4. I don't care who you are, unless you are shamoo the whale how could you possibly eat a full sized appetizer and still eat an even fuller sized meal after? And I'm not talking about a huge plate of nachos or anything, no, it was this massive plate of lettuce wraps. It's like they try and make everything bad for you. Lettuce, not caloric, not even really of any substance but with the accoutrement they adorn the plate with you may as well be eating a big mac combo. We also ordered sliders. You know, those baby burgers that usually come 3 per order. 5. 5 sliders and by sliders they really meant the same size hamburger as McDonald's regular burger. What kind of an appetizer is that? Thats a whole fucking meal.

Funny enough, but not surprising, the only thing that came to the table in a normal sized portion was... you guessed it, the beet salad. I guess they don't want their customers to overdo it on nutritious beets and wholesome arugula.

The kicker is that both nights I have eaten in this establishments 2-part chain restaurants they assume dessert. On night one our waiter asked over five times if we had considered the fresh baked desserts made to order and tonight after filling our table with 10 pounds of food to the point that the table itself was invisible underneath the gluttonous portions, the waitress asked us if we wanted dessert.

I know as a waitress you have to ask, its the polite thing to do but come on. As if I would be able to eat one more morsel of food after my super sized appetizers.

Now the really sick part is that people freak out for this place. We waited 45 minutes just to get a table on a Sunday night at this place. And all around you people sit and eat a full 3 course meal, which by any healthy standards is a 10 course meal. And you wonder why you weigh the same a mid sized elephant... hmmm, I can't even begin to put a finger on it.

I'm not going to say you shouldn't eat there. They do have a rather famous and delicsious dessert section, and I am not going to give away the identity of this place to clog your arteries and add 2 inches to your waist per serving all I can tell you is it rhymes with shmeezchake actory....

Point: Do you have a healthy appetite? That's great! I salute you. I am not trying to say don't eat or not to enjoy pigging out Smeezchake style here and there- fuck I did it tonight. I'm just saying that when morbid obesity is a big problem where you live, perhaps you should consider PORTION CONTROL. Shmeezchake people, you are feeding one person not a fucking army unit.

But you have such such good shmeezcake so keep that up.