Ok, so I am late in the week on this but I just watched Bachelorette last night from Monday and woohah- what an episode. I am pleased to report that my 2 favorites are still in the running. Emily and I totally have the same taste- minus her choices of clothing, teeth and points at which she turns on the Southern accent.
Highlight of the episode by far was Doug. Doug was, in case you don’t watch and still care, the single dad who was nicknamed “humble Doug” by his friends- I think that in itself sheds some light on this guy. Very sweet, dorky as all hell and moved romantically at a snails pace- all the other dudes are busting out the hand J blanket and poor Doug is just getting up the courage to hold hands.
So, at this point, all the dudes have professed their love for her in some way or another (and yes, saying it through a puppet show totally counts) and good ol Humble Doug has yet to sit right next to our Bachelorette- so obvi, she dumps him.
Breaking up is truly hard to do BUT this was beyond the most brutal and embarrassing one yet. As she is more than obviously dumping his humble ass, he leans in and gives her this super awkward peck on the lips- he doesn’t even flinch and proceeds with her break up speech- it was horrible/ amazing to watch. we rewound that part several times to really truly enjoy the tremendous shame in it all.
Anywho, aside form laughing at other peoples misery which would no doubt condemn me to hell if I believed in it, the break up really made me think about break ups. I am obvi not having one and have not for 5 years but friends of mine who are in the dating game are and it is always interesting the strategies we use and the hilarious (and by hilarious) I mean often heart-wrenching experiences we have with them.
Props to Emily, our Bachelorette for taking the no-bullshit approach because this is, truly, the most fair and reasonable one- a lesson that I learned over many years of dating and finding a variety of ways to end things.
You could learn from this post or learn the hard way but I can guarantee that taking honestly as your main approach to relationships is always a win win.
Now, you could try the “be-rude-until-they-get-the-hint” road- it is effective for sure. Do bitchy things (or the manly equivalent to bitchy), be late or break plans often, speak like a total ass, flirt with other people around them, ignore them, put them down or just berate them daily and likely, unless the person has zero self esteem, they will dump you BUT the risk you run is that they will also hate you. You may think, who cares, but when person X becomes your boss or someone in your life in the future, you will care.
You could also go for the “avoid them completely until they just go away” tactic but unlike your pimples, relationships of any kind do not get better if you ignore them- in fact, they need to be popped- im barfing in my mouth at this analogy.
Moving on.
Avoidance is sometimes effective but usually the people you need to go out of your way to avoid are the same people who believe in a bit of persistence- eventually it gets awkward- plus Murphys law says you are bound to run into them during the avoidance phase so better to just nip it in the butt.
Finally, there is the newer “text” approach. Fuck your cell phone and internet- you shouldn’t date over text, you shouldn't break up over text- in fact you should not do anything in a new relationship over text. Nothing. IF you can’t call them, you don’t respect them and if you don’t respect them, why are you even dating them? Do you not respect yourself- I went there. OOOOOHHHHH YESSSSSSSSSSSSS
RESPECT yo self.
Shit, honestly people. Try it
Worried about breaking their hearts- trust, they will get over it and you- fast
Worried about being nervous- really? Are you? Pussy
Worried about what they will say- who cares
Worried about any repercussions- who on earth are you dating anyways??
Anywho, pertinent information inspired by the Bachelorette- yup, that shiz is for realz.
Happy Thursday.
Thursday, June 28, 2012
Wednesday, June 27, 2012
A pathetic apology
It is totally moot for me to apologize for disappearing on you the way I did.
I just suck.
I am moving in like, under 2 weeks and the lure of bubble wrap and boxes has taken over my time- and envisioning me as a laboring mover is a bit misleading, more like I sit with bubble wrap on my lap and fantasize about a slate grey accent wall. You know, the really important stuff to do when your house is a mess and nothing is ready
So, it was pretty good that this weekend past amid just an overall fabulous weekend, we got some shit done.
Furniture shopping is the new clothes shopping. Mark these words. I wasn’t even intrigued by the rows of pastel tops in any given storefront all along Queen but mind.blown for the sexy ottoman upholstered in felted grey wool- I wonder if this makes me an adult or an addict shifting their medium? Column A + column B??
So on Sunday, we woke up SO early and drove up to Aberfoyle for the weekend antique market. If you havent been, you should go. Aberfoyle is just outside of Guelph Ontario and boasts one of the oldest and best antique markets in the world. What can you find? Everything. Like, every-thing.
We bought our first piece of furniture at the market too! We are the proud owners of a coffee table and 2 side tables.
So this, dear readers, is essentially what you are missing when you don’t hear from me in several weeks.
Rest of my weekend? It was not as furniture centric. Friday we had late drinks with our amazing neighbors who we will be leaving, and Saturday was just the best day ever.
We spent the whole day in Trinity Bellwoods park with friends, and when everyone left, my hubs and I had an impromptu date. Not to sound like a total ass or anything but it honestly felt like we were teenagers in lurve. We held hands, made out at street corners. Plus, he FINALLY let me pick some new things for him to spruce up his wardrobe. We had a late dinner at Kho San Road which was fabulous and gave us the chance to reminisce our honeymoon....
We get pretty busy, and especially now where a lot of our free time is occupied with house stuff so it is always nice to reconnect and do stuff that has nothing to do with anything except enjoying each others company. There is no one in the world I would rather send it with and no one makes me laugh more.
K, you are caught up with my life and the day to day stuff now so next post I go back to ranting.
The end.
I just suck.
I am moving in like, under 2 weeks and the lure of bubble wrap and boxes has taken over my time- and envisioning me as a laboring mover is a bit misleading, more like I sit with bubble wrap on my lap and fantasize about a slate grey accent wall. You know, the really important stuff to do when your house is a mess and nothing is ready
So, it was pretty good that this weekend past amid just an overall fabulous weekend, we got some shit done.
Furniture shopping is the new clothes shopping. Mark these words. I wasn’t even intrigued by the rows of pastel tops in any given storefront all along Queen but mind.blown for the sexy ottoman upholstered in felted grey wool- I wonder if this makes me an adult or an addict shifting their medium? Column A + column B??
So on Sunday, we woke up SO early and drove up to Aberfoyle for the weekend antique market. If you havent been, you should go. Aberfoyle is just outside of Guelph Ontario and boasts one of the oldest and best antique markets in the world. What can you find? Everything. Like, every-thing.
We bought our first piece of furniture at the market too! We are the proud owners of a coffee table and 2 side tables.
So this, dear readers, is essentially what you are missing when you don’t hear from me in several weeks.
Rest of my weekend? It was not as furniture centric. Friday we had late drinks with our amazing neighbors who we will be leaving, and Saturday was just the best day ever.
We spent the whole day in Trinity Bellwoods park with friends, and when everyone left, my hubs and I had an impromptu date. Not to sound like a total ass or anything but it honestly felt like we were teenagers in lurve. We held hands, made out at street corners. Plus, he FINALLY let me pick some new things for him to spruce up his wardrobe. We had a late dinner at Kho San Road which was fabulous and gave us the chance to reminisce our honeymoon....
We get pretty busy, and especially now where a lot of our free time is occupied with house stuff so it is always nice to reconnect and do stuff that has nothing to do with anything except enjoying each others company. There is no one in the world I would rather send it with and no one makes me laugh more.
K, you are caught up with my life and the day to day stuff now so next post I go back to ranting.
The end.
Wednesday, May 30, 2012
Grey.
Dear readers,
Is it not futile at this point to keep apologizing for late posts, or weeks without posts at all? Yes, it is so I wont but I will reiterate how world/life has been really kicking my ass lately. If my world was a mortal combat game, I would be losing. If it was X men versus Magnito, you best bet that I would be magnetized against a wall. If this was Hulk Hogan versus Andre the Giant in a Wrestlemania for the ultimate title match... I don’t know who I would be, but it would be as self pitying as my other references.
Anyways, I could regale you with tales of insomnia, or something equally mundane or we could discuss the thing that is on everyone’s mind; 50 Shades of Grey.
I totally swore to myself that after the Hunger Games, I was off books that would be made into movies starring Robert Pattinson (and ya, he is totally in the next hunger games, I am not cross referencing Twilight -k?- doubt he would be 50 Shades, but he seems like the broody male character that would fill the role). Anyways, swore off crap books and vowed to pick up the Murakami on my nightstand and delve in.
And then I met Christian Grey.
It was an accident really. I had heard the name but not been formally introduced until one fateful night out with friends, the wife of the couple we were with happened to have it lying around and asked me if I wanted to try it. And I totally know that this is sounding like a scenario where someone lures you into smoking for the first time or something, but it is just that addictive.
Anyways, I took it home swearing to just glance it over and then put it aside for an actual good read. 1 full book later, that didn’t happen. 50 Shades of Grey is just that good/bad.
In case you have been on another planet, this book is socially acceptable porn. Like full out, graphic porn but you can read it on the subway and the only “looks” you will receive are others like you that are trapped in the world of uber erotica and are ashamed to be imagining the red room of pain while surrounded by strangers in their work clothes.
It is possibly the worst written book I have ever read ever. BUT the ridiculously simple and horrific sentence structure and poor use of very layman language only serve to make you skim the crap parts of the book a bit faster and get to the nitty gritty.
And of course, like any “good love story” (and I put that in quotes to accentuate the fact that it is in fact a terrible love story) it totally makes the female character out to be a ridiculous joke of a female. Don’t want to ruin too much but the things that Ana is ready to overlook just from dude smiling her way is laughable. I have seen all those someecard things about being in love with the character of Christian Grey and ladies, if you in fact are in love with this character, I pity you.
So anyways, obviously finished book 1, promised myself a break and promptly got book 2 which is now significantly worse because the whole book is still written as bad AND the initial shock of the lewd sexuality is now diminished (I am fully still reading it, and book number 3 despite this).
So basically, read the book.
The end.
Is it not futile at this point to keep apologizing for late posts, or weeks without posts at all? Yes, it is so I wont but I will reiterate how world/life has been really kicking my ass lately. If my world was a mortal combat game, I would be losing. If it was X men versus Magnito, you best bet that I would be magnetized against a wall. If this was Hulk Hogan versus Andre the Giant in a Wrestlemania for the ultimate title match... I don’t know who I would be, but it would be as self pitying as my other references.
Anyways, I could regale you with tales of insomnia, or something equally mundane or we could discuss the thing that is on everyone’s mind; 50 Shades of Grey.
I totally swore to myself that after the Hunger Games, I was off books that would be made into movies starring Robert Pattinson (and ya, he is totally in the next hunger games, I am not cross referencing Twilight -k?- doubt he would be 50 Shades, but he seems like the broody male character that would fill the role). Anyways, swore off crap books and vowed to pick up the Murakami on my nightstand and delve in.
And then I met Christian Grey.
It was an accident really. I had heard the name but not been formally introduced until one fateful night out with friends, the wife of the couple we were with happened to have it lying around and asked me if I wanted to try it. And I totally know that this is sounding like a scenario where someone lures you into smoking for the first time or something, but it is just that addictive.
Anyways, I took it home swearing to just glance it over and then put it aside for an actual good read. 1 full book later, that didn’t happen. 50 Shades of Grey is just that good/bad.
In case you have been on another planet, this book is socially acceptable porn. Like full out, graphic porn but you can read it on the subway and the only “looks” you will receive are others like you that are trapped in the world of uber erotica and are ashamed to be imagining the red room of pain while surrounded by strangers in their work clothes.
It is possibly the worst written book I have ever read ever. BUT the ridiculously simple and horrific sentence structure and poor use of very layman language only serve to make you skim the crap parts of the book a bit faster and get to the nitty gritty.
And of course, like any “good love story” (and I put that in quotes to accentuate the fact that it is in fact a terrible love story) it totally makes the female character out to be a ridiculous joke of a female. Don’t want to ruin too much but the things that Ana is ready to overlook just from dude smiling her way is laughable. I have seen all those someecard things about being in love with the character of Christian Grey and ladies, if you in fact are in love with this character, I pity you.
So anyways, obviously finished book 1, promised myself a break and promptly got book 2 which is now significantly worse because the whole book is still written as bad AND the initial shock of the lewd sexuality is now diminished (I am fully still reading it, and book number 3 despite this).
So basically, read the book.
The end.
Friday, May 18, 2012
Dear dick...
To the stupid dick driving in his old ass Sebring this morning on Mount Pleasant heading south around 8:30am. You know what? Fuck you.
I have a serious bone to pick with you, driver of crappy car, and others like you who may drive better or worse cars but still mirror your horrible driving/ life skills.
Here goes.
I am very sure that you are indeed, the most important person in the whole world. Sure of it. I know that without you being wherever you had to be in such a rush, the world could have potentially imploded and life as we know it would have ceased to exist. Perhaps your old shit car was a disguise, a ruse you play on regular humanity to convince them that you do not in fact do god work and you are not in fact master of the universe. You wouldn’t want everyone to know how very very important you are or else they would know how to find you. Yes, the car must be a disguise for your otherwise super-hero like life.
That is it right? Because I cant think of any other normal reason to drive like such a stupid shit unless the very balance of all life is hanging in your Sebring steering wheel gripping hands.
So tell me, Batman of Toronto, am I right? This AM at 8:30 were we regular people blissfully unaware of the impending doom that threatened everything we know?
What's that? No? You are just a regular shmuck in your shit car trying to weave your way to freedom from traffic that just doesn't exist here in rush hour in the heart of the city?
Well, let me tell you something about that. First of all, it is really f-ing dangerous. You were cutting people off, hiding in blind spots and speeding like a demon down a normal street in the to-work commute. You drove like that right past 2 schools for children. What on earth could you have been thinking?
Not only to you outrage everyone around you, but you put the general public in danger when you behave like an animal the way you did.
People who do this kind of crap on the road are one of my top peeves. Don’t you have any self respect? How can you in good faith, put yourself in so much danger. You are not alone on the roads and even if you trust yourself to drive like a chimpanzee, how can you trust that everyone around you will react and drive accordingly? You are an accident waiting to happen and there are far too many of you out there for my personal liking.
Also, you made my husband upset and if we had even so much as run a curb because he was slightly agitated, that would have been your fault. Can you bear that weight?
Moreover, are you willing to bear the weight of causing a fucking accident?
Anyways, you are a dick and much like other people who irk me in life, I wish you unpleasant diarrhea.
Take heed jerkstore. Next time I may offer you more than a middle finger.
(unless in fact you are secret Batman hiding in disguise with a Sebring- in that case, you save that world mofo.)
Thank you,
Jane.
I have a serious bone to pick with you, driver of crappy car, and others like you who may drive better or worse cars but still mirror your horrible driving/ life skills.
Here goes.
I am very sure that you are indeed, the most important person in the whole world. Sure of it. I know that without you being wherever you had to be in such a rush, the world could have potentially imploded and life as we know it would have ceased to exist. Perhaps your old shit car was a disguise, a ruse you play on regular humanity to convince them that you do not in fact do god work and you are not in fact master of the universe. You wouldn’t want everyone to know how very very important you are or else they would know how to find you. Yes, the car must be a disguise for your otherwise super-hero like life.
That is it right? Because I cant think of any other normal reason to drive like such a stupid shit unless the very balance of all life is hanging in your Sebring steering wheel gripping hands.
So tell me, Batman of Toronto, am I right? This AM at 8:30 were we regular people blissfully unaware of the impending doom that threatened everything we know?
What's that? No? You are just a regular shmuck in your shit car trying to weave your way to freedom from traffic that just doesn't exist here in rush hour in the heart of the city?
Well, let me tell you something about that. First of all, it is really f-ing dangerous. You were cutting people off, hiding in blind spots and speeding like a demon down a normal street in the to-work commute. You drove like that right past 2 schools for children. What on earth could you have been thinking?
Not only to you outrage everyone around you, but you put the general public in danger when you behave like an animal the way you did.
People who do this kind of crap on the road are one of my top peeves. Don’t you have any self respect? How can you in good faith, put yourself in so much danger. You are not alone on the roads and even if you trust yourself to drive like a chimpanzee, how can you trust that everyone around you will react and drive accordingly? You are an accident waiting to happen and there are far too many of you out there for my personal liking.
Also, you made my husband upset and if we had even so much as run a curb because he was slightly agitated, that would have been your fault. Can you bear that weight?
Moreover, are you willing to bear the weight of causing a fucking accident?
Anyways, you are a dick and much like other people who irk me in life, I wish you unpleasant diarrhea.
Take heed jerkstore. Next time I may offer you more than a middle finger.
(unless in fact you are secret Batman hiding in disguise with a Sebring- in that case, you save that world mofo.)
Thank you,
Jane.
Wednesday, May 16, 2012
Pardon me but you have crap on your face.
So the other day I was riding the subway to work with my husband and once aboard and face to face with him on the crowded and dreaded super-subway I noticed some dried gunk on his face. Whatever, gunk happens so I reached and began to scratch it off with my nail.
He was obviously immediately embarrassed ad said so, out loud to which the man behind me replied "you got nothing to be embarrassed about brother". First of all, NICE MAN!! He totally made me smile and his sweet interjection into a totally private moment was actually welcome and appreciated... and I am totes not being sarcastic- it was really great.
Anyways, this of course got me thinking about when you (and you being anyone) have food or crap on your face and you are in public with someone who notices said food/crap.
K, I hate that moment when someone tells you something embarrassing about you- like your fly is undone or you have a wedge of broccoli in your teeth- but so much worse when no one tells you and then hours later you look in the mirror, realize that you spent your whole day looking like an asshole.
Alls I am saying is that you should be so lucky to have a friend or wife who will not only tell you about it but then pick the gunk off of your face. I think it would be embarrassing NOT to have someone like that around you.
The end.
He was obviously immediately embarrassed ad said so, out loud to which the man behind me replied "you got nothing to be embarrassed about brother". First of all, NICE MAN!! He totally made me smile and his sweet interjection into a totally private moment was actually welcome and appreciated... and I am totes not being sarcastic- it was really great.
Anyways, this of course got me thinking about when you (and you being anyone) have food or crap on your face and you are in public with someone who notices said food/crap.
K, I hate that moment when someone tells you something embarrassing about you- like your fly is undone or you have a wedge of broccoli in your teeth- but so much worse when no one tells you and then hours later you look in the mirror, realize that you spent your whole day looking like an asshole.
Alls I am saying is that you should be so lucky to have a friend or wife who will not only tell you about it but then pick the gunk off of your face. I think it would be embarrassing NOT to have someone like that around you.
The end.
Monday, May 14, 2012
10K...done!
Happy Monday dear readers.
Yesterday, May 13th at 7:45 am I got in my coral lineup and waited for the sound off to mark my 10k start. If you have read me this last little while, you will know that I have been training to run this race for a long ass time and so, as you can only imagine, I was a bit nervous about this day.
Well nerves be gone because day is done, gone the sun and I did it!
That’s right- this arm flailing, 2 left feet, no stamina, thought she would have a heart attack if she ran too hard ran that mofo the whole way through which is truly proof that if you want to do something, you can.
Sure, my legs feel like lead bricks and sure, my hips are cursing at me every time I breath- but the satisfaction of getting that off my bucket list is unparallel.
Now, the morning didn’t begin as I had imagined (me leaping out of bed at 6:30 am, excited by the possibility of the day and abound with energy) and instead was a bit of a grump-fest. My husband, who ran with me, was feeling like crap and subsequently less than enthusiastic about the run.
But once you get to the Sporting Life start gate, it is impossible to stay grumpy. The energy and the crowd is truly inspiring and seeing how many people are there and are about to attempt the 10k is equally amazing. Plus Nike, clever clever Nike created little signs that you could pin on the back of your bright yellow top that said Never. Stop _________. People filled in their blank line with tons of different inspirational messages which was nice but it served more than just a message board purpose... Every time I felt like I wanted to slow down or give up, I looked up at the upper ass of the person in front of me and read that line “never stop” and I obeyed.
Plus I got to run almost the whole thing with my friend and my husband- he left me at 5k to pee and she left me at 7k to sprint ahead... But the best was at 9k when I really wanted to just walk the last stretch, my legs were burning and I was just done, my husband caught up to me and we got to finish the race together. He was totally my inspiration (loves you)
Needless to say, we took an epic nap, I forgot about the entire pizza and box of chocolate that I ate the night before (to carb-load, of course, not to just be a gluttonous pig....)
Had the first good sleep of my month courtesy of my aching body and physical exhaustion and m ade a vow to another 10k by summers end.
Yes, meet my new addiction folks, running.
Oh, and I would be wrong not to acknowledge the most wonderful sales girl at Lululemon who outfitted me with the most amazing running shirt eves. This shirt is like a magic shirt. It is UV protecting, anti bacterial, wicks away moisture and is as light as a feather. I think it is their Silver line- you should buy that shit. And it is hella cute. What what.
Anyways, spending brunch and dinner with my mother in law and mother was the best way to end a totally amazing morning! Hope you all had a faboosh weekend too. Cheers to the summer, feels like it is finally here!
Yesterday, May 13th at 7:45 am I got in my coral lineup and waited for the sound off to mark my 10k start. If you have read me this last little while, you will know that I have been training to run this race for a long ass time and so, as you can only imagine, I was a bit nervous about this day.
Well nerves be gone because day is done, gone the sun and I did it!
That’s right- this arm flailing, 2 left feet, no stamina, thought she would have a heart attack if she ran too hard ran that mofo the whole way through which is truly proof that if you want to do something, you can.
Sure, my legs feel like lead bricks and sure, my hips are cursing at me every time I breath- but the satisfaction of getting that off my bucket list is unparallel.
Now, the morning didn’t begin as I had imagined (me leaping out of bed at 6:30 am, excited by the possibility of the day and abound with energy) and instead was a bit of a grump-fest. My husband, who ran with me, was feeling like crap and subsequently less than enthusiastic about the run.
But once you get to the Sporting Life start gate, it is impossible to stay grumpy. The energy and the crowd is truly inspiring and seeing how many people are there and are about to attempt the 10k is equally amazing. Plus Nike, clever clever Nike created little signs that you could pin on the back of your bright yellow top that said Never. Stop _________. People filled in their blank line with tons of different inspirational messages which was nice but it served more than just a message board purpose... Every time I felt like I wanted to slow down or give up, I looked up at the upper ass of the person in front of me and read that line “never stop” and I obeyed.
Plus I got to run almost the whole thing with my friend and my husband- he left me at 5k to pee and she left me at 7k to sprint ahead... But the best was at 9k when I really wanted to just walk the last stretch, my legs were burning and I was just done, my husband caught up to me and we got to finish the race together. He was totally my inspiration (loves you)
Needless to say, we took an epic nap, I forgot about the entire pizza and box of chocolate that I ate the night before (to carb-load, of course, not to just be a gluttonous pig....)
Had the first good sleep of my month courtesy of my aching body and physical exhaustion and m ade a vow to another 10k by summers end.
Yes, meet my new addiction folks, running.
Oh, and I would be wrong not to acknowledge the most wonderful sales girl at Lululemon who outfitted me with the most amazing running shirt eves. This shirt is like a magic shirt. It is UV protecting, anti bacterial, wicks away moisture and is as light as a feather. I think it is their Silver line- you should buy that shit. And it is hella cute. What what.
Anyways, spending brunch and dinner with my mother in law and mother was the best way to end a totally amazing morning! Hope you all had a faboosh weekend too. Cheers to the summer, feels like it is finally here!
Thursday, May 10, 2012
Dreeeeeam. dream dream dream...
So, it is Thursday and obv my mind wanders to the upcoming weekend....
Espesh after having such a dismal week.
Have you ever had insomnia? I battle with sleep often and badly- so I know my dear friend insomnia quite well. I always think it is the yang to the yin of having an active mind- in times of creating, talking, exploring, having an active mind is the bomb- in times of stress and anxiety, it is what leads me to remain sleepless for weeks on end.
People often think insomniacs do not sleep at all. This is incorrect. Insomnia, in case you are in need of a quick tutorial is marked by several symptoms including
So I sleep, certainly, but have the most awful sleeps making me wish I could just not sleep to avoid the fake sleep I am otherwise experiencing. And it isnt like I am wired, on drugs or heavily caffinated either. In fact, more often than not I have had sleepytime tea or another equally sedative pre-bed concoction....
Here is my typical insomniac night;
Get in bed and read/ watch whatever my hubs is watching on tv
Turn off lights
Remember I have to pee
Get back into bed and try and get comfortable
Cant get comfortable begin to jimmy feet
Realize that all my jimmying has made me have to pee again
Get back into bed and repeat being uncomfortable
Realize it has been an hour since lights off and my level of discomfort has now make me wide awake
Think
Realize another hour has gone by
Debate taking a sleeping pill
(hour will determine whether or not this happens)
Go back to bed and keep my eyes closed until I fall asleep
Sleep restlessly and dreamlessly for 2-3 hours
Wake up and realize I still have 1-2 more hours of precious sleep until I actually have to be up again
Finally fall asleep into a restful sleep only to get woken up by my stupid alarm too soon after.
Find getting out of bed painstakingly awful
Do it and continue the day exhausted
Drink coffee
Repeat.
In the meantime, my husband snores peacefully beside me and the rest of the sleeping world rests their weary heads and recoup.
Anywho, it is starting to make me feel wonky but usually comes and goes in and around 3 weeks- which frankly is the maximum amount of time it takes to go actually insane.
But I have more to bitch about. Being sleepless makes me irritable (or PMS does, either or)
Sweet dreams....
Espesh after having such a dismal week.
Have you ever had insomnia? I battle with sleep often and badly- so I know my dear friend insomnia quite well. I always think it is the yang to the yin of having an active mind- in times of creating, talking, exploring, having an active mind is the bomb- in times of stress and anxiety, it is what leads me to remain sleepless for weeks on end.
People often think insomniacs do not sleep at all. This is incorrect. Insomnia, in case you are in need of a quick tutorial is marked by several symptoms including
- Trouble falling asleep on most nights
- Feeling tired during the day or falling asleep during the day
- Not feeling refreshed when you wake up
- Waking up several times during sleep
So I sleep, certainly, but have the most awful sleeps making me wish I could just not sleep to avoid the fake sleep I am otherwise experiencing. And it isnt like I am wired, on drugs or heavily caffinated either. In fact, more often than not I have had sleepytime tea or another equally sedative pre-bed concoction....
Here is my typical insomniac night;
Get in bed and read/ watch whatever my hubs is watching on tv
Turn off lights
Remember I have to pee
Get back into bed and try and get comfortable
Cant get comfortable begin to jimmy feet
Realize that all my jimmying has made me have to pee again
Get back into bed and repeat being uncomfortable
Realize it has been an hour since lights off and my level of discomfort has now make me wide awake
Think
Realize another hour has gone by
Debate taking a sleeping pill
(hour will determine whether or not this happens)
Go back to bed and keep my eyes closed until I fall asleep
Sleep restlessly and dreamlessly for 2-3 hours
Wake up and realize I still have 1-2 more hours of precious sleep until I actually have to be up again
Finally fall asleep into a restful sleep only to get woken up by my stupid alarm too soon after.
Find getting out of bed painstakingly awful
Do it and continue the day exhausted
Drink coffee
Repeat.
In the meantime, my husband snores peacefully beside me and the rest of the sleeping world rests their weary heads and recoup.
Anywho, it is starting to make me feel wonky but usually comes and goes in and around 3 weeks- which frankly is the maximum amount of time it takes to go actually insane.
But I have more to bitch about. Being sleepless makes me irritable (or PMS does, either or)
Sweet dreams....
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