And from that point on, anywhere I went I was run-ning

Sorry that I suck so bad readers. I got all caught up in my mini vaca that I have neglected you like last years short shorts.
I am back, refreshed, and eager to write.
So hi! How are you?
I am great after spending last weekend in sunny Florida, shopping to my little heart’s content and reading books in the sun. And now, it is already the weekend again (Bless these short weeks)...

So this weekend I have the distinct pleasure of celebrating the engagement of one of my favorite couples on earth. Even my husband, who usually doesn't get too excited about shindigs like engagement parties is excited to cheers these 2 cats. Seriously- they have some good shit going on... You know how some loves just feel like really good loves?

My husband and I often feel like we have the best love in the world (which we do) and it just warms our hearts when we meet other couples who surely feel the same way- we are lucky to know a good bunch of such pairs and always look forward to spending time with them.

Love love.

Anywho, so this coming week I begin training to run the upcoming 10k for Sporting Life. In case you don’t know about it, this is a wicked run associated with an even better charity- Camp Ooch is a non-for-profit camp for children who have been affected by cancer and when you enter this run, your money goes to giving kids a chance to BE kids and spend their summer in a kid environment where they learn all sorts of new leadership and friendship skills- there is a whole lot more to it, I am totes summarizing but this organization is close to my heart and worth some time and support. Just saying.

Wooha- that got real for a second- ok, so back to the 10k. I have run it for the past 2 years (and by run, I mean the first year I walked and the second year I sort of ran/trudged my way through, crawled through the finish line and couldn't walk properly for a week after).

In the meantime of course, my husband, who was just as untrained as me RAN the whole thing and even made good time- and so, in true competitive sprit, I promised myself that I would run it too, the whole thing, no crawling or trudging, and like he did last year, be able to go to the gym the next day with no pain. Ambitious? Maybe.....

So, my most amazing personal trainer- who also happens to be one of my closest friends suggested we run/ train to run together and since I pretty much do whatever she tells me to do in pursuit of a 6 pack, I said Hells Yes.

So starting Monday, I run. I run a lot, and I keep running until I can run more, and then I run until I can run even more and by May 13th I will be running 10ks in my sleep.

But here is the thing. I am a terrible runner.
You know that Friends episode where Pheobe runs and she looks like a mental patient flailing her arms around? Well, that’s pretty much me, with more flailing and I pant. I don’t really know why- like, I do other cardio, I can swim, spin, whatever but running makes me pant like a fat Golden Retriever.

Either way- this Plantain running= HOT MESS- my trainer doesn’t know this yet but she has a HUGE shock coming to her. I doubt she will be able to keep a straight face while watching the disaster that is me.

Plus, again, with only running- I have no stamina. Last 10k I barely managed to keep up with the 75 year old obese grandmother in front of me- how can that be?? I am a pretty physically fit and active person and yet while she barely broke out a sweat I was dry heaving in her shadow.

They say, especially with running that you have to “practice” and “train”- well, I put these notions to the ultimate test. Right now I can run for about 5 minutes straight without my chest and legs caving in- I vow both to train properly and consistently to see if I really can learn this skill.

I promise not to make this my health and fitness blog since I would rather eat barf than spend my time reading one of those let alone writing one- but I will let you know in a week or 2 if I look less like one of those wavy inflatable tube things and more like a human being.

Happy Friday to you all- hope you are all doing something wonderful to celebrate this amazing weather (voms)

A Grammy rant.

Happy Monday friends,

Oh man am I looking forward to a short week and a weekend of sunshine and shopping (my 2 favorite Ss) I did a routine purge of my closet to prepare for the upcoming spree- my heart is giddy with anticipation.

So? How was your weekends?
What? Mine? Oh, it was nice...
Spent some QT with the hubs, did the most amazing yoga class that made me totes sweat, caught up with some friends over dins, saw my favorite group of girls for a hilarious brunch, and celebrated a friends upcoming wedding with tons of family and friends- it was rejuvenating and just good.

Last night, after the pre wedding celebrations my hub and I were all reved up on good endorphins when we got home so we stayed up to watch the end of the Grammy awards (and by we stayed up I mean that I stayed up and he sat beside me complaining and switching the channel when he felt bored aka. every 5 seconds).

I love award shows- I kind of don’t even care what they are awarding as I certainly don’t watch for the movies/songs/dignitaries that are being honored. No peeps, I watch for the clothing- but let me get to that in a minute....

Because, although I am usually not one to have any kind of commentary about something as inane as the Grammys- I will say this. I have, for a long time, been in shock that someone like Chris Brown was allowed to have a comeback. Sure, I believe in repenting your sins and I even believe that people can change and become good people- I just think if you beat the shit out of your girlfriend and then the whole world finds out about it, allowing you to have a comeback kind of justifies the behaviors- repent Chris Brown, rehabilitate, apologize...whatever but kind of unfair that you get to make a bagillion dollars and be a role model and icon to millions of little R&B Pop star loving kids when you did what you did- maybe he is a whole new man now but doesn’t the whole ordeal make you feel like maybe the underlying message is that it is ok to beat the fuck out of your girlfriend because you can always make it better and be loved by the world again. Bet the moms of abused girlfriends would disagree.... Anyways, not like me to be so “political” or whatever- but I find this to be one of the most disgusting examples of why our kids all have to fear for their youth and ideals...i don’t even have kids- what on earth am I ranting about?

I am just not so into that... But my personal hatred for him as a person aside, we flipped on the TV just in time to see his performance of “Beautiful People”- so this was my actual point- what the fuck is wrong with music right now?

The Grammys- an awards show for excellence in music is showcasing a former wifebeating dude who danced in a smoke show and FULLY lip sang his own song. How is that excellence?

I am all for this new recognition of pop and electronic music being recognized as “award worthy” but if you perform on the Grammys/ win an award, don’t you think you should sing? AND if you bother to sing a few words in your 99% lipsinched song, maybe no auto-tune??

It makes me sad to see a former Beatle take the stage with crap like that.

And also, pairing my beloved Foo Fighters with Deadmaus was gross. It took Dave Grohl about .000005 points down on my celebrity crush list. So there.

And of course, there was the many shout outs to the late Whitney Houston. I swear I was the last person in the world to hear that she died in the first place....

Im sad.
I totes liked her.

This is why you should not do crack. If Intervention has taught me nothing else, it is that crack is not good.

Seriously people, no crack.

I spent the whole of Jennifer Hudsons tribute with goosebumps and my husband telling me to relax myself. It was really emo right?

Bitches be cray cray.


Right so the fashion part that I love so much- it was awesome.... so much glitter- man, I love glitter. If I had a good voice/ any talent at all I would have a been a pop star fo sho (because, you know, it IS just that easy)- I would do it all for the glitter. And, say what you will about Gwyneth- how hot is that lady?
gong show.

Anyways, my final note about the Grammys- I met my blond twin.
Dear Kimberly from That Band Perry,

I LOVE your style. I almost crapped myself with that long skirt/ wifebeater combo you wore while performing- it is my total dream to wear a wifebeater with a formal skirt- that is exactly my style. Obvi I spent the rest of my night googling pictures of her (because im creepy girl crushing that way) and now have hair-spiration for the rest of my days! I have printed PAGES of pictures to show my hairdresser when getting it did for weddings etc. Watch out now.

And her clothes! Country casual boho chic. Kimberly, I love you. I really needed that.

Ok, done now. Grammy overview over. Woot woot.

V Day.

So peeps, Valentines Day is just around the corner- oh, and happy weekend- yay, the fun begins!!!

Remember when Valentines Day was a big deal- like, didn’t want to exist if you didn’t have a bf kind of deal? Is it still like that? I have no concept of what it would be like to celebrate a holiday without a significant other so I really don’t know if it is as ridiculous for late 20 early 30 year old women now as it was when we were 15.

Back in the day- V day was marked by excessive games of MASH and the ever fan favorite game of rating your peers by both looks and personality which ultimately resulted in disclosing your newest crush which meant they may or may not find out and then talk to you by recess which then meant you may spend recess together holding hands which would of course lead to you having a Valentine to exchange cheesy gifts like a stuffed animal or chocolates with which would lead way to the inevitable break up 1-2 weeks later when it became uncool to have a boyfriend/ girlfriend again.

15 year old kids fully have sex now so perhaps my above point is moot.

Can you imagine how crazy being 15 now must be outside of  V day- I totes digress but I was first kissing and just discovering what the bases really meant at that age- I wonder if there is pressure to lose your V card on V day???

Ah thinking about kids these days is always good birth control.

Anyways.

Soon after those pre-teen/ early teen years Valentines day was another marking of who had a serious monogamous relationship and who was a lonely single person- because, on V day, you couldn’t possibly be happy and single right? No- you were doomed to a night of envy and Ben and Jerrys.

V day also became this benchmark for new relationships- what would you get them? What would they get you? How would your first love holiday go? Would they drop the L bomb? Would it be a diamond?

I have spent a few Valentines Days with different boyfriends over time and have seen everything from the gift of an engraved Zippo lighter (because nothing says I love you like fire), jewellery (that Oliver Jeweler now has), dinner with complimentary champagne (sparkling cheap wine) and roses (I hate flowers), and candy...ok, so I hoard cinnamon hearts all year- so what?
Alls I can say to this all is it is no wonder it never worked out before I met my husband.

So how did we benchmark our relationship, you wonder?
No flowers, no bullshit, no I love you, just a paper crown, dinner eaten with our hands and a wining red and yellow knight- and ya, I am talking about V day at Medieval Times. It was always meant to be right from the beginning.

And then, in the natural progression of things, Valentines Day has become something you kind of ignore because, after all, you-love-each-other-every-day-so-why-do-you-need-another-day-for-this-expression-of-love-and-plus-you-are-way-too-cool-for-something-as-trite-and-stupid-as-valentines-day-plus-you-are-on-a-diet-because-your-stupid-old-body-cant-metabolize-chocolate-like-it-used-to-and-you-will-probably-just-gain-another-pound-or-develop-the-dreaded-adult-zit-and-flowers-are-expensive-and-you-have-a-mortgage-(or the thoughts of the mortgage to come)on-your-mind.

It’s like the more secure you are in a relationship, the less you have to prove yourself by celebrating an invented holiday.

Or on the flip side, much like sex at prom, it becomes the day to get engaged- which, I must digress and say: don’t.do.
Why would you do that? It is like proposing on a birthday, new years, or Christmas. What happens if the relationship doesn’t last? So every valentines/birthday/new years/Christmas should be a miserable reminder of your love lost? Or if the relationship does last you have to share your freaking anniversary with another holiday- NO, I will take 2 separate days of celebrating thanks so much.

Well, F that. I am standing against engagements on V day but more against being too cool to celebrate it. If everyone stopped celebrating bullshit holidays then I’m pretty sure May 2-4 and Halloween would be on the chopping block as well- what about Family Day?? That shit was JUST invented in my lifetime! We have to take a stand people. And sure, we don’t get a day off for Vday- but we do get sale holiday chocolate on Feb 15th and onward- and isnt that better?

And so, this year, I am celebrating- we are getting one another activities and we will love them dammit.
But seriously, how cute is that? Activities?? V day yields 2 fun dates instead of 2 pounds.

Holla. What are you doing to celebrate your love?
Wakakakakaka- how deep is your love????????????????

Skating is good

Oh hi.

So, I am spending today all hyped up because tonight is my first dodgeball semifinals and I really want to kick some ass. My husband cant play tonight and I want so much to come home with stories of my success to regale him with- good luck to me right?

Good thing that I have an ultra competitive spirit to go with my inability to throw a ball.

Anywho, so last night, fresh off my cold, I met up with one of my oldest friends for a night of catching up. The best thing about old friends is how little you actually need to catch up and how even littler you need to explain yourself. So we have this tendency to do really cute activities together- we both have similar hobbies and interests so often she is the one I will see plays, art shows or a concert with and likewise, I will always choose her to go see a sports game should I come across tickets because we both love arena food and don’t really get the game and in our younger years pre my husband and her live in long term man, loved picking up guys at basketball games.

I digress.

So last night we went...da da da daaaaaa (that’s a drumroll)... Skating and I am pretty sure it was one of the funnest things I have done in a long long time. Plus, like riding a bike, you totally don’t forget how to skate even if your skates are totes rusty on the bottom indicative of how long it has actually been since you last went.

So I whipped out my figure skates, you know, from when I was a figure skater (never happened) and my warmest winter attire and got to it.

Having spent 1 hour on the ice here is what I have to say about it, other than that it is awesome:


1. next time, I am wearing full padding- I didn’t fall but I kept thinking about how painful it would be if I did. This stopped me from joining the 4 year old girl on the rink with us in going super fast and then making that really cool skater stop where you spray ice everywhere.

2. everything is so much scarier when you get old- I obvi had so much fun but every time I wavered or lost my balance I imagined my weak 30 year old bones breaking, my precious legs or arms bruising or worse hurting my much needed knees. Remember being fearless (well, in fairness, I don’t I was a pretty fearful child) but remember? That was a nice time- you had no idea how much you could hurt yourself back then- life was full of skating fasts.

3. skating= amazing workout that is actually enjoyable. My legs felt like jello after an hour and although my shins are sore as a result of wearing skates that were made a good 40 years ago and have little to no ankle support for a newbie skater, I can feel how much muscle I used

4. Finally, this shit is free yo. Parking was free, skating was free and the locker was free. How about that? What can you do these days for a whole night that is free?

So skating- do it.

Recap post sickness

Happy Tuesday folks.
This past weekend was a busy one that did nothing to help the raunch cold I have been housing since last Thursday. Um, dear cold, you have overstayed your welcome. Please Leave now.
I cannot blow my nose anymore. I will literally not have a nose left if I do.

So, despite walking around the city like a grandmother with dirty kleenex tucked into every pocket and sleeve, I tried to enjoy my Saturday before succumbing to the couch on Sunday and Monday for the much needed R&R that has just barely helped me to feel better.

We began Saturday with a trip to the Organic farmers market at the Brickworks- this is an awesome market in the summer and was not half bad for a smaller indoor version in the winter. Plus they make some wicked food on the spot- which we would have loved had I not been starving (aka a total hungry bitch) and insistent on trying the new-ish restaurant “Café Belong”

Ug, Café Belong- you have a bad name- like a bad Sesame Street name.

Thankfully, you also have delicious food. I think the first thing I said that morning upon opening my eyes after a crap nights sleep was “pancakes”- Café Belong’s pancake offering was just the perfect thing. Dense, carby delights with crispy edges, bourbon maple syrup and pears. I have not eaten pancakes (or carbs for that matter) in many many months- while I (and my stomach) instantly regretted the meal after completion, it was amazing- my tastebuds sang.

My husband had a homemade pork sausage with fried eggs- the sausage, and fyi, I love sausage- was amazing. Sweet, porky, sweaty. Amazeballs.

They serve all their food on Le Creusette stuff so all the waitresses have buff arms from carrying cast iron all day long. I should get a job there.

Anyways- we spent the afternoon running errands- because married life is glamorous like that.

At night- and I am sorry because this is about to become a whole post about where I ate all weekend- because you give a shit- I went out with my girlfriends to celebrate one of their new engagements. Hell to the ya because she is marrying the best guy ever. I totally love this dude and cannot wait for them to say I do.

In the meantime, the girls went out to talk dresses and marriage consummation.

Acadia- on Clinton just north of College was our place du jour or du nuit... Whatever.

So- Acadia, think we all agreed that this was not the BEST place we had ever been but there were some tasty bits worth mentioning- like the grits. Could bathe in them- they were like heaven with cheese- or the scallops- or the grain risotto that was a wicked version of kasha and bow sans bow. The cocktails were a delight and the wine was totally good.

The mains were lacking though which was a bit disappointing and the dessert, while we finished it, was just weird.

What was nice was that dinner was long, which I don’t often find- they were in no rush to kick us out or make us uncomfortable to the point that we felt obligated to pay and leave and so we spent about 4 hours dishing and gossiping together- seriously love these girls.

And then, sickness hit and I watched more hours of crap television than I care to recount.

Dear daytime TV- you make me never want to be a stay home mom. Ever. 

70% off

Yesssssssss.... it is finally Friday.

So, pretty happy it is Friday although, as of this morning I think I offish have a cold again. I swear as of late I have had the immune system of a baby. Every time someone sneezes around me, I get sick.

But, cold or not, I will be enjoying this weekend. I have a dinner date with my 2 favorite girls eves... we are going to a restaurant I have been dying to try and celebrating the engagement of one of said ladies to her ultra-faboosh bf (fiance).

Anywho, today I spent my lunch wandering around Bloor with my co-worker- holy hell do I hate sale season.

Ok, so I don't hate sales in the sense that you can get stuff for cheap- lord knows if anyone loves a deal, it is this plantain right here. I thrive on a good sale. But sale season? no thanks.

First of all, "sale season" totally diminishes any excitement related to finding a good sale to begin with- everything is on sale so nothing is special- it is impossible for me to flex my bargain hunting biceps in this climate.

Second, everything is cheap and that is just dangerous. I actually have to hold things for a few minutes at least to fully determine if I like it, or I like it because I can afford it. Do I NEED that shirt with horses on it- would I buy it if it wasn't 19.99? The amount of restraint I am forced to dedicate to shopping in this time is too much for me to just enjoy the experience as much as I could/ should.

There is the added element of being married to a man who cringes every time I come home with a new bag- making my purchase selections even more important- I have to really love that shit to weather his disapproving eyes.

Also- and this is a qualm of mine in life- people treat clothing like shit. This is so much more so in sale time where everything is beyond picked over. I don't care if you are selling it for 1 dollar- there is nothing appealing about a snag/stain/lipstick/ or BO on clothing.
It is all just gross to watch- people rummaging like animals. Throwing stuff all over the place and fully shoving to get to the 29.99 rack faster. A woman in Zara today fully pushed me aside when she saw me eyeing the wool jacket that she apparently needed more than me (which is fine, I don't need another new jacket- my husband would agree)... but bitch, push me like that again and I will bust out a 69.99 stiletto heel on your ass.
I used to work at this store, which shall remain nameless although its wears are as shit today as they were back then- I have been there as recent as this year while helping a friend look for a party dress- same behavior, different year. So this nameless store carries mid to expensive dresses, some gowns but mainly party/ cocktail styles. The owner just hangs them- no plastic wrap, no consideration of not putting a beaded number right next to an ultra delicate chiffon- and as such, every single dress is damaged (a fact she will deny if confronted by a customer). I cannot fathom how people shop there and feel happy with their purchases. If I am buying a dress to wear to a wedding, my preference is that it is well treated, doesn't have a bagillion pulls and rips and is carried by a store that takes an iota of pride in their displays.
just saying.

Sale season is like being in this store but everywhere.

Even my beloved well merchandised GAP is utter chaos right now compared to regular season

Finally- how in the world can I feel excited about last seasons sale crap when they are showing pastel for spring- pastel and neon. I am humping the fashion gods. It is impossible to buy anything when you are taunting by full price gorg.

Anyways- sale time. boo.

So happy Friday y'all- enjoy your weekends, whatever you get up to- see you Monday with a restaurant review- I am going to shovel my face with all their promising food.

First world problems

Happy hump day peeps. TGIW- or something like that.

So last night my hubs and I went to pick up our (his) new computer!! woot woot. We (he) are the proud new owners of a MacBook Pro- new Macs are the best things ever. period. If you use a PC, yes, I judge you- PC can't compete in the same way that BBM is just a crap version of the otherwise popular text message- which comes up in a neat little bubble on the iPhone by the way.

Love MAC, HATE the store. That entire store smells like an airplane after an 8 hour flight- bad breath and body smells- I have no idea how such a clean looking store smells so damn dirty- probably because of the never-ending clusterfuck of people waiting to harass the staff about the i-whatever. It is only the shiny new products you can get there make it worth venturing in.

So, while we were at it, I also brought in my 3 year old Macbook to be doctored and made to run more optimally. The Genius who helped me (haha doesn't it sound like I am being sarcastic about an idiot who helped me- he was actually a genius- a Mac genius, but a genius nonetheless)

Anywho, he works his magic, looks yup at me and mumbles his condolences for my hard drive that, according to the tests, will not live past this year. My computer requires a hard drive transplant and will be the recipient of a brand new hard drive with double the GBs or something like that (wouldn't know seeing as when he asked me what I use my computer for my answer was "home stuff" and when he asked me how much memory I have used I said "whatever home stuff takes up"- savvy savvy tech girl, that's what they call me).

So, the kicker of course is that my husband's old laptop, an older Mac has been on the fritz since we moved in together 2 years ago- so, as a good gf would, I let him have full access to mine to do with what he pleased. While the Genius Mac dude said that we had done nothing to cause the hard drive to lose its gusto- seems fishy to me that my husband uses my computer all the time, then gets a new one as mine slowly dies a horrible death.

And this brings me to my point about technology and my significant other.

He always does it better than me

I am eternally jealous and never never ever have better technology.

Literally, never. What was once the better computer in the house (mine) was quickly usurped by his brand freaking new computer- I got the iPhone 3, he bought the 4. I didn't even bother with the iPad- he had one on opening day.

And now my big issue (and by issue I mean first world problem) is that I am due for an upgrade on my heinously old iPhone 3. Why a problem you ask? Well, problem because I have to patiently await the iPhone 5 so that I have a running chance of beating him in one part of the tech wars. Who wants to wait that long for a new phone?

And of course, I live in the fear that the iPhone5 I get will have all kinds of glitches that they will revise in the second outpour of iPhone 5 which he will inevitably get and then have this perfect phone that cuts the crust off his bread while I struggle with my erroneous hack version of it.

Ya, that's me bitching about just HAVING to wait for the new iPhone and just COPING with the first edition of it- cue the tiny little violin playing the saddest song of all time + barf.

Would you rather me bitch about the woman who drive too fast on my street and subsequently spray me with slush resulting in slushy tights? No? then zip it.

So, technology and MAC- so boss but....

How can one possibly keep up?

Damn you Mac for making such super sexy and desirable products that change every year. I am always behind.