Got weekend plans?
I am celebrating my fabulous friend's dirty 30 with a bowling night.
Oh man, do I love bowling.
Like most things requiring the slightest of athletic ability, I suck at it- mind you, since training so hard these last few months- who knows, maybe my newfound strength will amount to my being a fabulous bowler (didn't help me much in dodgeball, but you never know)....
I have this really longstanding love for bowling and when it reappears in my life, as it often does, I revel in it.
A million years ago when I worked at a small resort in butfuck Michigan, my "days off" were limited to going into "town". I put town in quotations not because it wasn't a town, it was- not like we were in some crazy alterna-town or anything, but it consisted of a fireworks/gun/convenience store (all in one!), a bar/a seafood restaurant (combi-what), a community center, and a bowling alley.
To say I became a bowling pro during that summer away would be an understatement. I was balling (hahah- get it, with balls, like in bowling?)
But my summer ended and with it the popularity of bowling as a recreational option. Sure, over the years, as I mentioned, bowling has popped up here and there- usually as a hack date idea or something kind of ironic you do with friends at one of the shitty bowling alleys up north (and by shitty I mean amazing as they only play Dance Mix '92 and have neon glo lights that serve only to show you how unbelievably dirty their floors are while you drink warm American beer- a-maze-balls).
I would say about 2 years ago we started bowling again- it began as something funny to do while semi drunk on a Saturday night after dinner with a whole bunch of friends and turned into a desired activity of choice that we did more than a few times since.
I can't say that it is a direct result of this resurgence in the love for the pins among my friends that inspired someone to open a retro themed alley in the heart of downtown Toronto making bowling THE cool thing to do among the downtown sceney crowd- but, ya, what the fuck, I will. I think it no coincidence that our bowling adventure spawned into this rage- because, thats how we roll- inspiring trends all over the world.
Anyways- I digress. So, now I find myself attending the birthday of one of my more savvy and trendy friends and, voila, we are bowling.
Only now, years after my glory days- I really do suck. I tend to do the following;
Trip/slip on the actual alley
Throw my all into an adjacent alley- just to make sure that whoever is beside us hates immediately
Throw my ball into the gutter about 50 times in a row
Throw a tantrum
Rage internally as my husband tries to give me expert pointers
Rage externally when, after being yelled at to "aim to the right" I do so and end up throwing my ball onto that sides alley- nothing like 2 neighbors who are counting down the minutes until you leave
Throw the ball backwards and almost kill someone
Get a strike late in the game and spend the rest of my time there gloating about how I used to be a great bowler.
Anywho- can't wait to play with those waxed balls- big and heavy- just how I like them
Have a great weekend everyone- see you Monday.
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