If I can make it there

It’s been a while folks- a long while so get ready for a mini series of blogs beginning with last weekend.

Spent the past weekend in NYC- it was my bday present from my wonderful husband- love that man.
We had the best time ever. Our best friends moved to New York last year so we had a great crew to explore (eat) the city with. I have to say, I am a sucker for NY. I love the kitchy lure of the big lights bright city but this time around, being there, I couldn’t help but notice how sad it is to not be surrounded by nature. 

I look out my window, right now, I am downtown and have a view of forestry and greenery. I don’t think I have ever stopped to look at that before while in New York (maybe because I have never spent so much time in NYC NOT shopping)- anyways, it struck me as notable. Espesh when we walked by schools that have no playground and only a cement fenced off block for kids to play in- what kind of magical forest imagination games come from cement? Although I am criticizing a highly creative community of people, so there you go, maybe cement DOES foster wild imagination- what do I know?

I saw Brooklyn for the first time on this trip and fell in love- this is totes where I would live if I was living there. Brooklyn is like where Ossington would go to look for a hot guy with a moustache.

And of course, I wouldn’t have been complete without one outrageously amazing meal courtesy of the Stanton Social- 

ps. Always have though chef Chris Santos was super hot on Chopped, love when he hates the al dente-ness of pasta- LOVE IT.
 
 This meal was be-yond. We ate; lamb kebabs, carpacio, perogies, pasta, these friggin amazing French onion soup dumplings, meatballs, fish tacos...om nom nom- and they had the best mixed drinks ever of life. My tastebuds danced and sang all the way through former alphabet city.

We went to Grand Central Station in the middle of the night, went to a bonafide basement nightclub where I got asked about 5 times if I had drugs (do I look like  have drugs? I don’t), the late night deli, walked EVERYWHERE- seriously, I was limping for a good couple of hours, on the first day we did 8 hours straight....we went to the park, to the stores, to Mario Batali’s Eataly where I food-gasmed over the available offerings. It was magic.

So, overall, had a lot of fun and only made my husband slightly nuts trying to find the stores I needed to go to. Dear Frye, why are you so much cheaper in USA? I actually had to hold myself back from buying 2 pairs of the same boot in different colors and sleeping with both of them cuddled in my arms. I love you my new boots (only in black- first world problems). 

Then I dragged him to Uniqlo. Ever been? My coworkers had been talking about it for quite sometime and I felt compelled to have a peek. Welcome to American Apparel meets Urban Outfitters meets Gap on crack. 3 floors of unnerving space. They had a whole store size room only for socks- just socks... Do you know how scary a wall of thousands of socks can be? And they play all this music and have screens with weird anime and a dude on a microphone and flashing lights. If you have never had a seizure and are interested in what one might feel like, I urge you to pop in.

We spent the last day and night at our friend’s place in Washington heights- which is, surprisingly, a REALLY cool area. There they actually do have green space, a beautiful park with Cloisters and a super cute “Main street” which you have to climb about 4 bazillion stairs to get to so essentially, if you live there, you are cool with a wicked ass.

And, did I mention before that my husband had bought us Yankee tickets? I was totes not excited to go see a baseball game- um, hello, taking up my valuable shopping time- but it was actually really fun. We had amazing seats and people are so excitable at American sports games. The crowd was mental and when one patron dared to wear the opposing teams jersey, he was met with our whole section standing up and calling him an asshole. Even the little kid in front of us were doing it. They love them some sports. If my kid knows the word asshole before age 8 I am concerned for the state of my world but hey, differences make the world go round.

The weekend could not have gotten better, so it was only natural that it would end worse. From the moment we packed up our bags and hopped into a cab headed to JFK airport, things went downhill. Sure, leaving your vacation always sucks right? Like, who heads to the airport excited? Maybe I guess if you have a terrible holiday, but no one who has an enjoyable one looks forward to it being over- so it sucked and there was really bad traffic which, coupled with the hot air, my 3 days-worth of drinking hangover and overall exhaustion from another day spent wandering around with bellies full of dirty dim sum. Fab.

Anyways, lots of traffic and then, the icing (if indeed icing was not sweet and delicious and instead was awful and poop-like) was Delta. Delta, I haven't forgotten how you scarred me in the 90’s with that stupid documentary of your terrible crash in 85 that left people with horrible burns and scars which they graphically portrayed on TV. Should I have obeyed my parents and not snuck the TV on after hours thus subjecting myself to such a terrible R rated program? Maybe- but Delta, I never forget. 

And now Delta,  I wont forgive either. There is no “I’m sorry” for sticking us in the biggest bullshit line to wait only to check in our carry on bags (which, I may add, where perfectly acceptable sizes for Porter air who also would not have charged us 25 dollars per luggage if we CHOSE to check them). No apology can quite make up for watching our bags aimlessly thrown onto a broken conveyor belt with such force, I feared for the survival of my toothbrush. 

And what can you say about your rude ass customer service lady who stood directing the traffic in your terminal who was so incredibly stupid and unhelpful that you may as well have instated a cow to direct your customer. A cow, Delta, would have been more effective. Have you ever seen a cow give direction or provide even adequate customer service? Probs not- so why waste your money on a person who acts like one? How do you get paid for being a total asshole?? If I had know this was a life option....

Peeps, did you know also that you don’t have to subscribe to any basic hygiene in order to operate an airline? Who knew!
The bathrooms were the grossest I have ever seen (and my last trip was to Thailand where I saw bathrooms that were holes in the ground), the floors looked like they had not seen a vacuum since disco was cool and the walls, which, how do you even stain a wall??? Were, stained...

The flight- gross, my seat- sticky, the service- rude. It was a blast. Just a totally blast Delta. I cannot wait to fly with you again soon! That is a lie. You are the worst. Ever. Don’t care how much cheaper you are next time I book my flight- I learned my lesson well and I hate you Delta- no forgiveness, no forgetting.

Finally, we got pulled over by customs who thought my purse and wedding ring were smuggled contraband jewellery and accessories. Fine. At this point there was nothing to do but laugh (cry) at the circumstance.

Anyways, got home, safe and sound and now it has been over a week since I was away and I already feel like I was never gone, never relaxed and all I can think about is the next vacation. In the meantime.....memories of NY.

dirty 30

On Friday night I lay very still under my blanket at midnight, hoping that 30 wouldnt find me.

It did.

So birthday has come and gone and and now I am offish old. I have been dreading this year more than all other birthdays because, true or not, 30 seems like a real symbolic turning point in ones life a point where one must say goodbye to their 20’s which, for me was the saddest part of all.

My husband laughs and says all women hate getting old. Yes, because only women have issues that arise with age (cough cough, balding, cough cough- of course, he says this being a man blessed with a full head of hair and skin of a 15 years old so there you go). It is not the wrinkles I fear nor the greying of my hair- in fact, I don’t fear at all nor am I sad to get old. I am only sad to say goodbye to what has been the best years ever.

My 20’s have been filled to the brim with everything I ever dreamed they would be. I look back on this time with no regrets and in fact, am SO happy to have been as careless and reckless as I was- never will I utter the words, “I wish I had....”


I know that never again will I go out 6 days a week and think myself slightly lame for taking a day off- frig, I drink a glass of wine these days and just want to fall alseep... And truly, I am happy to be where I am now but really sad to say goodbye to all the memories and experiences- like going on a great holiday- you are always sad to leave.   

I have to say, now that it happened that I hope everyone misses their 20’s as much as I did on the night before 30- it means you had as good a time as I did.

But moving on,  I had the best birthday- really low key, no tears (after Friday) and a present to look forward to- Thursday my most wonderful hubs threw me a BBQ so I got to spend time with my friends and family, then Saturday, my actual bday I we went on an amazing long hike, saw some friends and had a big family dinner- we brought his and my families together which is always a bit entertaining to say the least. I cant remember the last time I spent a Saturday night birthday with my parents (and parent in laws) but I have to say, one thing about getting older (and having the most wonderful 2 families) is that I actually WANT to spend the time- I could not imagine who else I would rather be with- they made me feel special just by knowing that these are the people in my life (ok, ok, no more cheese, I swears it- a girl only gets to be 30 once so let me indulge)

AND, if all this were not good enough, my husband is taking me to NYC this coming weekend. Amazeballs.
If you know me, you know that NYC is like ritual for me and my family- we went at least once a year, every year for almost all my life. I never do the tourist crap there though- like, never been on the Empire State building, never been to the MOMA- I have seen the usual NY suspects while walking around and such and usually go to see at least one play while there but my family goes to NY for one reason, shopping. Can’t tell you how to get anywhere but know my way around every single store in that city- and, from walking around SO much in the past however many years, I got to know the city on foot, got to know the subways, the vintage markets, the hidden boutiques, the hidden cafes near the hidden boutiques and little pockets that maybe are a bit off the beaten track so to say it hasn’t been cultural would be a lie.

So obvi, I am dying to shop, but this time, in lieu of my husbands inevitable impatience for shopping and desire to do more than hold my bags outside change rooms, we will be doing it all. All the tourist crap I have happily missed, I will no happily do. Plus, we have some serious dinners coming up. Le drool.

And, our very bestest friend live in NY now so we have a chance to see NY through the eyes of people who live there AND we get to spend time in areas like Brooklyn- cue in hipster music.....now.

Whateves. I am excited. This week seriously cannot go by fast enough.

So that is my 30- not as bad as I expected- which is good

Fri-Fri

One of a kind show- I adore this show and anxiously await its return in the spring and winter.

Since I was little this has been an exclusive mom and me thing- we go to both shows, every year- just us. We once brought my sister who got cranky mid show and we resolved never to include anyone again unless in the far future I have a very well behaved, artistically inclined daughter- and only MAYBE then.

My husband is defiant and contradictory by nature- if you tell him he cant do something, he wants to thus making the one of a kind show one of his most wanted to do things of ever. For the past 5 years he has asked to join my mom and i- I don’t think he really wants to go, he just hates that we wont invite him or let him come- so every year he pushes and every year my mom and I continue our exclusive trip through the aisles.

Fast forward to now- my mom, for the first time ever, is not in the city and unable to come with me (which is only acceptable since the winter show is so much better than the spring show anyways- if this was winter, I would have kept her here)- anywho, she is away so my husband, for the first time ever has gotten the invite.

I giggle internally because although he has pushed to come along for 5 years straight, I wonder what he will actually think when he gets there tonight. I wonder how he will feel about the multiple fairy and doll booths, about the stained glass and jewellery- will he marvel at the various options of soap carvings or become horrified at the lamp shade booth. Hard to say.

I am pretty excited to see what he thinks about my favorite place in the world. And excited to just go- I have been fantasizing about the sample aisles for weeks- you know, the ones where they let you have tastes of the artisan foods? No dinner necessary.

Anyways, aside from tonight, we are also celebrating my nephew’s first birthday party!!! I cant wait- although seeing him turn one and then looking through my pictures from when he was born makes me realize how fast time goes by- I cant believe all that has happened in a year- mind.blown.

So enjoy your weekend and I hope to have some entertaining stories for you on Monday

Xo

Dont. panic.

Hi friends,

Thank you for reading and hopefully checking out my post and it’s link for the food trucks.
So, without getting too into the nitty gritty, suffice to say that today I am anxious. The about what is irrelevant because what I want to discuss is anxiety and methods to quell it.

I am an anxious person. I was born anxious, I will die anxious. My absolute biggest fears in life are completely absurd and yet cause me sometimes paralyzing fear- like my basement. I totally realize that there is no monster mutant bug (or serial killer) hanging out where I hang my wet clothes to dry or do my laundry- I know that just because something appears to look like a horror movie setting doesn’t mean it is and I realize that going down to my basement for 5 minutes to pick up clean clothes doesn’t warrant a panic attack- I realize that while I shudder at the idea of being trapped in said basement I willingly roam the cemetery at dusk- but I am not scared of ghosts, just monster bugs and serial killers.

But my abnormal neurosis aside, what do you do to combat anxiety when it is so all encompassing. I have been sweating from my palms for like, 3 hours straight and drank one too many coffees resulting in a combi of gut rot and overactive caffeinated plantain.

I think back to the days when I spent a few months seeing a therapist for anxiety and it’s related effects on my person and all I can recall is her telling me to breath.

Well, duh.

I’m nervous, not suicidal for gosh sakes.

And I will tell you this- I have been breathing all day long and don’t feel a stitch better.

So I think to what other people tell me, be in the moment, try to focus on something else, engross yourself in an activity...
Do these things work for other people? Maybe I am doing it all wrong but I am pretty sure that there is not a whole lot that can distract me from this- shit, even chocolate isnt working....

If you have a tip, please share- my sanity will thank you later. 

Food for thought

Hi friends and followers.

Please take a minute to check out this very cool thing that you can do to make sure that we get the wicked awesome food trucks that you drool over on TV.

Due to a few bylaws, we are not allowed to have the food trucks in Toronto- this was not always the case- we once had over 300 trucks serving hot and tasty treats to the great citizens of the Tdot.

Peeps, you know I love food already and food trucks are like my heaven BUT more than a food truck, I LOVE a good petition. You should too- please help me and your fellow Toronto food addicts by checking out this website and filling in a letter to your Councillor.


I will be back later this afternoon with something much less preachy and annoying to write about- unless you don't sign...then you are doomed to have me repeat this a bunch more times.... save yourselves.

Green Machine

Happy week everyone,

Miss me yesterday? I had a crazy day but even after I got home totally zonked from a variety of meetings etc, I still was able to drag my ass up (and my husband’s ass too) and go for a run in the cemetery.

I think probably one of my favorite places in the whole world is the cemetery. It is so quiet and pretty and peaceful and I feel absolute serenity there. In the middle is my absolute favorite part, the mausoleum with a really nice pond- if I meditated, it would be there.

Anywho, this was the first time that we have run together (well, that is not entirely accurate- last year when I was much less able to run, we ran together too but this was less a run and more a me having a temper tantrum n the belt line in plain view of all passers by including but not limited to one of my husbands co-workers. Embarrassing- I had to be REALLY sure I was up to the task before asking him to run with me again)...so this was our first real run together and it was really fun to spend that kind of time together. We both felt fab after and it was a great way to get rid of the day and let go of all the stuff burdening us.

So, perfect timing to be really happy and relaxed because we had a night of couch ahead of us and for once, I was actually excited to spend the evening in front of the TV. As I have mentioned, probably many times, I hate TV- however, I do watch a few shows here and there and most of them are on Monday nights- so usually in any give week, we PVR the stuff we want to watch and then we can take smaller 30-60 minute times during the week to watch them which is WAY better than several hours of the tube to me.

But last night we had a special treat awaiting us-Frozen Planet. Now I totes thought that Planet Earth was super famous, like everyone knew about it- I guess I was mistaken because it seems that I have spread the word to a few friends who have never even heard of it let alone seen it- planet earth is this amazing documentary on earth, life, water, nature.... Anyways, it is amazing and SUPER interesting with stunning footage of stuff that you never get to see.

Frozen Planet is its cold counterpart focusing on all things nature in the poles. Northern Canada gets a lot of dap, which is pretty amazing too! We started the series on Sunday night but only got through the first hour so we were anxiously awaiting the second half all day. Loves that shit.

Frozen icicle plants- don’t mind if I do.


So, going backwards, did you have as busy a weekend? Did you celebrate St Patty?
Ug St. Patty. Is there any holiday I dislike more? I don’t mean to be a hater but dear world, you are not Irish, even for a day- even if your skanky sash or party hat or shot necklace or t-shirt say otherwise.

My husband jokes that I am old and probably loved the holiday in the old university days. Wrong. Hated it then too and even more because who needs an excuse at that time in life to drink all day and all night? Not I.

What I dislike about it begins with green beer. I don’t have a problem with food colored beer per say- more the green piles of vomit that litter our streets the morning after as well as drunken losers yammering in your face with green tongues. Festive food can be awesome and fun- this is just gross.

Also, why do people feel the need to become belligerently drunk? It isn't like on this one and only day everyone gets their ID for the first time ever and gets wasted beyond belief at the cowboy club (anyone else? Huh? Huh?) you can drink 365 days of the year- and you can get just as drunk as people choose to get on this one day. Ok, ok so this past Pattys was a Saturday- that gives a bit of merit to the all day all night booze fest and ya, it was nice out- which makes the whole day better so I will let that slide, but a few years ago when we went out (because, St. Pattys is one of my husband’s favorite holidays- opposites attract??) it was a Tuesday. Who on earth is getting piss faced on a Tuesday?? Tuesday are reserved for creepy bar locals and creepy bar locals only.

And finally, the costumes. Urrgrgrgrgr those costumes. Dressing up like an asshole in green does not make you festive- it makes you an asshole in green- the bigger your hat/shades/slogan/accessories, the stupider you are.

And I totes realize what a debby downer I sound like- blah blah blah, I  hate celebrating a drinking day- blah blah blah, green is not my color- I swear I am not- I will drink, I will drink you under the table- I will dance to Celtic music- shit I run to Celtic music every day, I will cheers my fellow tables, smile as I sip, dance, run the streets all a muck- I will do it all- just not with over- cologne douchebags who pile out of their hummers decked out in skank gear and green- I prefer my beer clean and shmuck free.


Hope you had a fabulous Irish celebration. xo

Some thoughts on Foie Gras.

Readers.

It is  Friday and over the course of the day my plan is to bombard you with all the posts I meant to put up this week but then didn’t. My bad.

So, nothing like sun to start the end of week off right- just another of the more wonderful effects of this whole weather thing that scares more than delights me with every super sunny day.

I must say though, that it has been a full year since I stopped commuting via car and began my rocket riding commute- never been happier. Even this morning as I emerged from the subway I smiled. I watched a nervous woman try and make a left turn from Bloor while biting her nails and thought to myself “self, you are lucky that isnt you”

I would stand in anyones armpit (ah I hope I didn’t jinx myself to stand in the ultimate BO master’s pit) over driving. Any day.

So first of all, I want to give some dap to a new restaurant I tried Wednesday night for my mom’s birthday. Catch at Rushton and St. Clair- you are yummy. All seafood and fish so if you are not a lover of the waters, don’t go. However, if you are, go- it is really good! I had oysters, scallops, and fish galore! Nom nom nom.great service, pretty space. Overall, two thumbs up by me.

So, the scallops were adorned with foie gras, and this brings me to my rant of the day- I hate foie gras.

For the past few years this menu item has mystified me- I actually had not idea what it was and only assumed that it was something pish posh like caviar but even more classy as to stump even a self proclaimed foodie like myself.  Then, in the past 2 years at some point, I tried it and discovered what it was, liver.

Well la-de-dah for me because I love liver (and any animal part- but liver I have totes grown up on). I don’t remember thinking twice about it when I tried it so I cant say I hated it instantly but I will tell you this- I do now.

The last time I can recall having it was at Colborne Lane for my 9 course dinner- a treat for my hubs and I right after we got married- it was beyond, I gained 20 pounds that night.

Anyways, I hate when I don’t like a food- I want to love everything and in the spirit of my personal motto on life, I have to try everything in order to know about it so with that in mind, I ate the foie gras on one of my 9 plates. And then I barfed in my mouth.

To me, and I am not trying to yuck anybodies yum, it tastes like ground chalk with fat and poop- and yes, that is the most creative way I can describe this “delicacy”- poop.

So then the next time it came into play was shortly thereafter on my plane to Thailand. Bless you first class for providing us with edible food and going the distance to even serve delicacies like foie gras but holy hell who needs that poop when you are flying? I tired it again, to be a good sport, gagged and then hid it under bread.

I haven't seen it since..... Until last night...

I don’t know why I even tried at this point- I have given this crap enough of a taste test to know, for certain, that I hate it. But I did, and not, even this morning I can taste the tiny drop I put in my mouth like it is there, melting, as it does, and filling me with an urge to yak.

So this morning I was sharing my disgust with my co-workers when I learned something new about my food mortal enemy- not only does it taste bad (to me, I’m sorry, I hate when people do that- you know, say something is gross even though it is only gross to them- I really don’t mean to offend you if you eat that poop- wait is calling it poop offensive too? I cant win.)

But it is also really bad- to the animal. Listen, I am no animal rights activist. I will go to hell in a fur coat for sure BUT, to know how unethical the production of this food is just gives me a better reason to hate it other than its poopiness.

So they feed these poor little ducks SO MUCH FOOD- they literally stuff them with fat so that the liver is huge and fatty so that they get the ultimate fatty-bombatiness for their future foie gras. I just picture poor ducks being hose fed food like a creepy horror movie, if ever they were made about ducks being bred to be killed. They don’t, but still....

So, there you go- reason enough to stop being such a poonans and just pass on the next foie gras offering.

Oh, and in case you haven't gotten the gist of the blog, I hate that crap. Ok?